Red Flags in
Children
Some of the psychological signs listed below can show up at
other stressful times in a child’s life such as divorce, death of a family
member, friend or pet, or when there are problems in school, as well as when
abuse is involved. Any one sign doesn’t mean the child was abused, but several
of them mean that you should begin asking questions.
Psychological red flags
- A child who clearly says, “I just don’t want to be
around Uncle X anymore.”
- Any avoidance that is confusing or of concern
- Sudden mood or behavioral shifts, both before and
after an encounter with an adult
- Hyperactivity
- Too much sleep, too little sleep, difficulty sleeping,
nightmares, or sleep disturbances
- Changes in eating habits (loss of appetite or trouble
eating or swallowing)
- Fear of previously likable places and people; fear of
making friends; fear of situations, such as being in the dark or being
alone; startled responses to loud noises or voices; possible paranoia about
being watched or chased
- Aggressive (verbal or physical) defiance, delinquent
behavior, excessive risk-taking behaviors
- New words for private body parts
- Difficulty at bath time
- Regression in behavior (i.e., an older child behaving
like a young child by doing such things as wetting the bed or sucking a
thumb)
- Depression, withdrawal, isolation, self-mutilation,
suicide attempts
- Changes in academic performance
- Talking about a new older friend
- Refusing to talk about a “secret” that she or he has
with an adult or older child
Physical red flags
- Unexplained bruises, redness, or bleeding of the
child’s genitals, anus, or mouth
- Unexplained urinary infection or sexually transmitted
disease
- Frequent headaches, stomachaches, or body aches
- Fatigue or feeling overly tired or unmotivated
- Heart palpitations or difficulty breathing
- Various sexual reactions, from being overly fearful to
being promiscuous
- Unintended pregnancy at an early age
- In younger children, constant rubbing or irritation of
genetalia
- Persistent sexual play with other children,
themselves, toys, or pets
- Displaying sexual knowledge through language or
behavior (beyond what is normal for a child’s age)
- Drug or alcohol problems
- Self-destructive behaviors such as scarring arms with
razor blades, needles, or cigarettes
- Spacing out at odd times
From “Creating Safe and Sacred Places” p. 30-31